As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17

Think of your best friend.

Think of why they are your best friend.

Is it because you can stay up for hours talking? Is it because you can show up to each other your worst and still receive love? Or is it because you know they would say to you how it is – you know that they would tell you if you are completely, utterly insane and completely, utterly sane? Do you know that they are a best friend because they won’t hold the truth from you?

This past month, I watched the movie Mufasa. One song that I really enjoyed was “I Always Wanted A Brother.” If you have yet to see the movie, (one, go and watch it, it’s incredible) the brief synopsis is that it’s an interpretation of The Lion King’s Mufasa’s childhood and how he met Scar (or Taka in the film). Taka is the king’s son of another lion tribe and he longed for a brother. Mufasa and Taka had an immediate connection and broke out into song. Here’s part of the song from “I Always Wanted Brother:”

I dare you to say that again to my face

What did you say ‘bout my brother

That’s not a stray, that’s my brother

You stay away from my brother

‘Cause I say so

If you put your paws on my brother

You’ll meet the jaws of his brother 

As a little sister to brothers, I can understand what Taka meant about warning people away from hurting his brother. This past week, we talked about family and how to love them. We talked about the messiness of that love. How we love our family, but sometimes it is hard. As the only daughter, I can relate to Taka’s yearning for a brother. I still vividly remember, at age eight, asking my mom for a little sister and she just laughed and said no. I wanted a little sister to play with. I was not thinking that I would fight with this little sister, or that she would probably get on my nerves, or get into my stuff, but only of the good things. I was imagining that if I had a little sister, she would be someone I could play with and love, protect, and teach just like Taka imagining what it would be like having a brother.

I grew up. I made close girlfriends in college and in my twenties. I learned about the sanctity of girl nights. I learned that sometimes all that you need is to order pizza late at night and do a fun activity with your girlfriends whether it’s filling out madlibs, writing a funny story, or having an at-home spa night. It gave me a taste of what it could have been like to have a sister, while still knowing that it is different.

Because I did not grow up with my friends. If I fight with them, it is not in the same way of how I fought with my brothers. My brothers and I fight in a unique way that shows that we still love each other. Siblings grow up with each other, and how they loved and fought helped nurture their developmental growth.

Friends, however, grew up in a different environment. They have a different perspective.

The verse at the beginning is a metaphor. In some versions, I’ve seen it written: “Iron sharpens iron, as does the countenance of a friend.” Blacksmithing is a long and tedious method. Blacksmiths use hammers to hit and smash against red-hot iron, the iron cools and gets twisted and pulled to be forged into something new. Yes, iron gets everything imaginable done to it – smashed, twisted, and pulled. It is a neat activity to watch if you ever have the chance, you’ll see sparks flying with every hit.

Applying blacksmith and iron to friends – Isn’t that similar? Friends don’t grow up in the same household as we do. They may not love or fight in the same way we do, but they are here to sharpen and help us draw closer to God. But because of these differences, sparks fly and tension and anxiety arise. But as we move along on the road of friendship, so does the heat cools down and like iron, we become pliable and can be twisted and turned. That’s like friendship. You can have an immediate connection with a friend – and that is great if you did! I have a couple of friends where it took no time for a friendship to ignite. However, no matter if it was immediate or slow, you have to be willing to change and to let those sparks fly.

Don’t let the iron stay red-hot. A quick Google search warned that when the iron overheats, a fire can break out. I think that can happen among friends. If a dispute between friends breaks out and no one intervenes, the dispute gets bigger and bigger until a fire occurs and you have forgotten what the initial fight was all about.

Iron sharpens iron, as does the countenance of friends.

Elizabeth