There are so many directions to go when talking about fear because it is something we all deal with in our lives. We all deal with both rational and irrational fears and sometimes it is hard to separate the two in our minds. And then we also have smaller fears in our day to day lives and bigger fears about the future. Just like we talked about with grief last week, everyone processes and communicates fear differently. Some people may hide their fear from others and put on a brave face while others may noticeably lose their minds when they are afraid. Some people may go into “doing” mode and do everything they can while others may freeze and not be able to function.
Isn’t it funny in the Bible how angels appear to people and the first words out of their mouths are often “Fear not” or “Do not fear” or something along those lines? Imagine if you were just minding your own business and then all of a sudden, a large, winged being appears in front of you. We often imagine angels as these beautiful beings and probably think that we would not be afraid if one of them appeared in front of us, but based on what I know of biblically accurate angels, having one appear in front of me would definitely be a frightening experience.
In the Christian community, it can be easy for people who are not married by 23 or 24 to fall into the fear that they will never get married. It is so common for Christians to get married at such young ages compared to the rest of the world that when people do not have the same timeline as their friends or peers, they can start to worry that something may be wrong with them or they will never find the right person. While they may know in their minds that God’s timing is perfect, it can be hard to believe that in their hearts when they feel like the only ones in their community not getting married. This is when the fear can start to creep in and in certain circumstances, it can be so subtle that it is not even noticeable until it completely takes over. Isn’t it so crazy that something seemingly so small and unimportant in our lives can cause so much fear in people?
Why do we have so much fear in our lives? The simple answer is that we do not put our trust in God as much as we should. We fear what could happen instead of trusting that whatever happens, God is in control. Isaiah 41:10 says, “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” What if we actually lived that out? If we actually trusted God as much as many of us say we do, we would have nothing to fear in this life. He is with us in every situation and He strengthens and helps us, but we often forget that in the moment and we give in to fear. We let fear take over when we forget to trust that God is in control, but when we remember to put our trust in His timing and plans, that fear has no hold on us.
This reminds me of a song called “The Breakup Song” that the Christian singer Francesca Battistelli wrote years ago. It is a whole song breaking up with fear. The chorus says this, parentheses are my own words:
Fear, you don’t own me
There ain’t no room in this story
And I ain’t got time for you
Telling me what I’m not
Like you know me well guess what?
I know who I am
I know I’m strong (the last chorus adds brave here as well)
And I am free
Got my own identity (in God)
So fear, you will never be welcome here
I really like that song because if you listen to the whole thing, it personifies fear and talks about it like a bad relationship that we need to get out of. The song points out how fear tells us lies about ourselves, but it also admits that we often let it tell those lies and we actually believe them. The important thing to remember is that fear will always tell us those lies if we allow it, but we have the choice to believe those lies or to believe the truth that God tells us about who we are and who He is. We have nothing to fear when we are truly trusting in God and therefore, we can break up with fear and stop believing the lies it tells us (easier said than done).
Abbi